Bamm-Bamm's Corner, 12/22/2009

First off, read the last column and say it with me.... CALLED THAT.

I've had a tough time trying to figure out what to write about this week, and the inspiration just hit me.

I'm sitting here watching the WWE "Tribute To The Troops" special that NBC aired last Saturday night (the 8th one they've done, for those of you playing the home game), and I think every year about how awesome this thing is.  When you realize that they do this thing almost as a "turn and burn," (remember, Raw was live the week before AND the week after they did this special), and seeing the joy and happiness that it brings to the troops leads me to one conclusion.

I don't care if you hate the very existance of professional wrestling.  I don't care if you think it's lame and pointless.  I don't care if you call it "fake," "stupid," or any negative label that makes you think you look cool to your friends.  I don't care if you snicker when you see me wearing any gear that supports programming that I have enjoyed since I wore a younger man's clothes.  Do it all you want, but I can say with a decent amount of certainty that the people whose work YOU enjoy don't go IN PERSON to a bonafide war zone to bring some fun to the people that lay down their lives for YOU each and every day, and even if they do (and I thank them for that), they don't do it EVERY YEAR, especially during the holidays.

This show hits me where I live each and every year.  To see the troops react like they do and talk about how they look forward to this event each and every year (and it is in a different place each and every year, by the way) is just amazing.  If this show does not affect you, then you are soulless.  I don't care who you are, you HAVE to respect the love and commitment that the WWE gives, not only to our troops, but also to the community itself (promotions involving literacy, Make A Wish, soldiers at home, etc.).

Let it also be said that TNA does some great charity work as well.  Have to give respect where respect is due.

Finally this week, while I am talking about celebrities entertaining our troops, I want to recommend a great documentary to all of you.  It is called "Patriot Act," and it is about a 2 week trip that Jeffrey Ross took to the Middle East with Drew Carey, Blake Clark, and a few other comedians to entertain our men and women over there.  What started as just a home movie turned into a life-changing documentary for him.  If you have the Netflix Instant Queue, it is available there to stream.  Think about those men and women this time of year that are half a world away from their families and send a request to whomever you believe in at the end of this mortal coil to keep them safe and bring them home even safer.

Happy Holidays to all of you, and make sure you hug your loved ones a little tighter, because they are YOURS.

BB

Bamm-Bamm's Corner, 12/09/2009

We're skipping all of the formalities this week, because I have a bold statment to make.

Shemus wins the belt at TLC, which you can see at Sports City Cafe in Mesquite, Texas.  So if you are close by (or close enough to get there), come join us!

Done laughing?  I'll wait....

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We good?  OK, follow me here...

I'd like to take you back to a simpler time that I like to call March of 1999.  I was ten years younger, I would meet the woman who would become my wife 6 months later, and WCW did a Pay-Per-View called Spring Stampede.

The main event of this event was a four corners match for the World Heavyweight Title.  You had Sting, Flair, Hogan, and a barely-there midcarder named... Diamond Dallas Page (Savage was the special guest referee).  I even punched the match up on YouTube to refresh my own memory.  If you remember correctly, nobody, and I mean NOBODY, understood why DDP was in this match.  (Granted, later we would find out that he is Bischoff's next door neighbor, and he was the dude that introduced Bischoff to Goldberg, and he does yoga... have no idea what that has to do with anything, but I was going with the "comedy rule of three" there.)  Even up until the match itself started, nobody really expected anything to happen of any consequence.  Then, a blown knee later on a figure four by DDP on Hogan (it's about at the 9 minute mark of Part 1 on YouTube) on the ring post, and things got interesting.  (The fact that people still use that move is INSANE.)

As the match progressed, I was in wonder at the amount of action that really was going on in this match.  For a Four Corners Match, I was intrigued by all four men and their goings on.  With Savage as the ref, his little "swerve" of dropping the elbow on Flair as he had the Figure Four on Sting (I wonder if this was supposed to be where Hogan won... come ON, you can't say you didn't think it either) created a quick Diamond Cutter by DDP and a pin.  The "???" of the entire crowd was deafening.  Here you have Hogan (dude has Creative Control, and he just didn't book himself to do the job without a lot of money and coaxing), Sting (my leader, especially OLD SCHOOL STING!!!!! IF HE HAD BEEN BLONDE AND WORE THE COLORS, THERE WOULD HAVE BEEN NO WAY HE WOULD HAVE LOST!!!!), and Flair (almost as long of a shot as Page, given the bad blood between him and Bischoff, and therefore by proxy, Hogan).  At the time, DDP couldn't draw heat if you taped a bunch of matches to him and dragged him across a field of flint.

And they put the belt on him.

As time went on, he would get it again, but he would end up being just a transitional champion (*coughCMPunkcough*).  Sure that may be true, but you know what?

YOU didn't see it coming.

When Shemus won that battle royal (and my GOD, how is it possible for Ventura to suck so much ass with a mic in the ring, but to be so GREAT at the announce table?  Even made Vince better...), I know that all of you had the same reaction that I did.  "I smell shenanigans here... Where's Randy to swerve this thing?  Where's d-X to make a case and get in?  WHERE IS OLD SCHOOL STING, FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS GOOD AND HOLY?"

OK, maybe not that last one, but if you did, God bless you.

But it didn't happen.  This is the match that is booked as THE MAIN EVENT OF A PAY-PER-VIEW.  That YOU can see on a really big screen at Sports City Cafe in Mesquite, Texas.  If you miss it, I don't wanna hear you whine about it.  And this is a Tables Match.

So, a mid-carder in the main event at a Pay-Per-View that nobody thinks can carry the company?

It's happened before.  And it will happen again.  Sure, I know the "get beat down on the Raw before the PPV, win at the PPV" principle (I virtually coined the phrase), but that could play into this whole thing too.

And d-X will win the Tag Belts.  No real parallel here.  Just wanted to say it.

Lastly, I thank the greatness that is my Tonya for the greatest sign EVER.  It's on my Facebook if you wanna see it, but it says "Rob > Ralphus".  If ya get it, ya get it.  If ya don't, ya don't.

Until next time, when I'm deciding that I like this format...

BB

Bamm-Bamm's Corner, 11/12/009

Allllready. Let's get into it...

No iMpact! stuff this week. I've been under the weather and didn't wanna leave the house. So sue me.

Did get to watch Superstars this week (see what happens when you do an encore presentation of your product?), so here we are...

Is it bad that during Primo's match that all I was thinking was "Where the heck has Carlito been?" Never thought I'd see the day that Primo would take the driver's seat. Not necessarily a bad thing, but wow.

Also, one has to wonder why Burchill isn't good enough for the League Of Nations. It's not like he used to work with Regal as a pirate or anything....

Finally, I wonder if Striker can sue Jericho for gimmick infringement with the five dollar college words.

SmackDown! is where we move to next.

You know, I have been called a lot of things in this life (some of them even have some truth to them), but "gelatinous" is not one of them. Sure, I'm a big dude, but damn...

Striker really has, in my opinion, found his calling here. I would love to see him work with JR when he gets back. A three man table? Maybe, but I could do without Grisham and the fake Martin Short that does the "Free For All" before the PPV's. And the ECW announce team.

The only other thing I really have to say here is hey, it's Rey Rey versus a big man... AGAIN. Narf.

Sign Of The Week winner this time around is "Jillian 4 X-Factor". For those of you that don't know, it's the UK's "Idol". Funny!

To Raw we go...

Ricky Hatton looked absolutely CLUELESS here. I did notice that he didn't bother to even try to say anybody's names so he didn't screw them up. The dude looked like he stopped hitting the heavy bag and BECAME it. Thank God he didn't go shirtless in his "match".

LOVE that shirt Shawn had. Good times.

Anybody else think Vince could take a page out of TNA's book and get some Diva Tag Belts? Might make the Diva tag matches not be as "whatever" as they are now. Oh wait, this is the company that has ECW, with ONE BELT. Go fig.

Didn't realize that WrestleMania is "the hottest ticket in town," which is a bit that they showed right after a spot letting you know that there are tickets still available.

Shamus? Meh.

"Cinco Dart Mayo," Chavo? Good stuff. And man, Chavo got TAGGED in that match. About as close to a perfect spot (and noise) as you can get.

Here's another bold prediction: a Miz/Swagger tag team is coming. BELIEVE IT.

Finally here, I don't care how many times I have to say this... I LOVE THIS KOFI KINGSTON PUSH. This could be the best move they've made in a long time, and it shows. The fans LOVE this, and the fact that they are having him take it straight to Orton makes it even better. Orton tries to retreat, and Kofi follows. THAT is how you do it, kids.

And I'm totally on board with the potential of the main event on Raw next week.

ECW had a bit to let me talk about, so let's do it...

When is somebody going to let Abraham Washington know that his watch reads 14:59? This bit was old before they even did it.

And Tony Atlas: you're a HALL OF FAMER, dammit. This is lower than when you were forced to be Mark Henry's lackey.

You know, I bet Zack Ryder wishes he was an Edge lackey again. Probably not as much as Hawkins, but still...

Really, Josh Matthews? Tiffany found Vance Archer when she discovered him in JAPAN? I didn't know that iMpact taped there.

And for those of you wondering, there's no WAY that Helms is the guy appearing as The Hurricane as of late.

Topic Of The Week is something that's been kind of bothering me as of late. As many of you know, Hogan is doing a tour of Austrailia before he gets the ball rolling with TNA. You may have also have read that Flair is going to be wrestling, and they are wrestling each other in each main event.

I know what you're thinking: "I know what's bugging you, Rob... Flair is returning to the rign without Shawn coming out and saying that he's cool with it..." At first, I was, and I'm not afraid to admit that. But, something's bothering me more...

Why do they have to wrestle each other? There's no WAY that Flair wins any of these matches (I mean "Hulkamania" is in the NAME OF THE TOUR), but why not go the other way with it, by letting them tag? Granted, you wouldn't have gotten the promo that Flair cut on the Interwebs for it (go look it up... you'll swear that it's 1987 again if you close your eyes), but Flair vs. Hogan barely lived up to any hype when WCW finally did it in like '93. Now, it just seems kinda sad. Let them go up against a couple of the younger pups and have some fun with it.

And Flair's getting married AGAIN. Ah, what the hell... mazel tov.

All right, all right, all right... I'm getting done just in time before Superstars starts this cycle all over again (I'm in Texarkana, Texas right now, so I can watch both it and iMpact! tonight), so until next time... laters.

BB

Bamm-Bamm's Corner, 04 November 2009

Holy crap! Another column! Keepin' the streak alive, kids, so here we go...

We start again with iMpact! Given the fact that we had the Hogan announcement and I couldn't record it, I actually went up to my sports bar to watch. For you people. Because I care. Or something like that.

We start with Desmond "My name is Nigel, dammit" Wolfe. I still want to know the REAL reason that Vince passed on this guy. I don't see him as that injury prone (coughAnglecough), but who am I to judge. I will say that he can be main event material in TNA. Here's a question, though: British Invasion, anyone? They've already got really cool shirts, and I think he could REALLY make them viable, and a split from World Elite wouldn't be a bad thing. I'm just sayin'.

So, I guess now that Angle is working face. I had to contact my good friend Mrrrrrrrrrr Coronado.... Coronado on this one, and he has actually worked face before (think the milk truck incident), but I think that only lasted about two weeks. Oddly enough, though, this kinda works for me. Maybe face berzerker Angle is what we need right now.

Is it just me, or does Rhyno sound like Eric Young?

A nice double swerve from Mick this past week, but I have to give a "WTF" for that promo afterwards. Heel Mick Foley just isn't getting it done anymore. I've always been more of a Commissioner Mick guy at this point in his career, but that's maybe just me. I'm a different breed of cat.

And as far as the Hogan press conference goes, he's a "momentum shifter"? Maybe 15, even 10 years ago, but I'm not sure. And he wants to bring "the art" back to professional wrestling? I kinda feel that TNA does a decent job of that on it's own. I've enjoyed their product for some time now, and find that their matches have better quality than Vince's.

And, I am reading that Sting will be off until "deep into 2010". Maybe it's because..... wait for it..... wait for it.... wait for it... WE GET BACK OLD SCHOOL STING!!!!! BLEACH THE HAIR AND BRIGHTEN UP THE FACE PAINT, BABY!!!!!!

(That was for all of you O.G. Corner readers. Both of you.)

Aaaaanyway... to Superstars we go.

Memo to Lawler: I HAVE to watch "Bragging Rights"? I already did, and I don't.

Rosa Mendez has an accent now? Wait for it, it's coming later...

I'm not sure what I am more sick of: "vintage," "bragging rights," or "smart, sexy, and powerful". Discuss.

Did we have to label Tyler Rex (I actually had to think to remember his name from my notes) vs. Zack Ryder as "East Coast Vs. West Coast"? 1994 called and said "Come On, For The Love Of GOD".

I have a note on Matt Striker here, but I'll save it for SmackDown!. My GOD, this show isn't what it was supposed to be. Remember when Superstars was supposed to be brand vs. brand? What the hell happened here? Bring back All-American Wrestling on USA Sunday mornings over this crap.

Sign Of The Week goes to the guy who simply had "SIGN" written. Simple and fun.

SmackDown! comes next. Is Teddy Long now oficially a "tweener"? He convinces Frenchie to turn on his brand to win Bragging Rights, but still tries to distance himself from Punk. I think he needs another female valet that can slap Vickie around a bit.

It's good to see Drew McIntire finally get a feud that might be entertaining. It's not like the Irish like to fight or anything. Where have I heard that before. Maybe for the love of Hornswoggle, unless he starts a tag team with Santino.

You know what I want from this Barista/Rey Rey angle? For Rey to try and try again to convince Barista that this is just "brothers fighting," Barista to keep telling him to go to New Jersey, and then for Rey to pull a double-swerve and go heel on Barista. Haven't had a good one of those in a while.

Here's something I thought I'd never say: GENIUS from Todd Grisham talking about having his Halloween costume be k.d. lang. THAT was funny; I don't care WHO you are.

I also wonder if JTG is the reason that Shad Gaspar still has a job. I like Shad and have made no bones there, but JTG has really emerged as the mouthpiece of that group. The dude can cut a promo and really has more energy than any one individual should at times.

You know, just when I thought we were on the right path of selling Punk as a heel, we have him in a match with a ref? Sure, the dude's an Armstrong, and did his time as a wrestler (it's kind of the law with that last name, if you do your homework... OK, here's a start: Road Dogg is one of his brothers... you do the rest), but it just didn't really work for me.

Lastly, as I promised earlier, I have determined that Matt Striker is given a list of five-dollar college words that he has to work into the broadcast at some point. I really do, and it entertains me. So there.

OK, to ROH we go...

Did I hear Prazak correctly when he said there was a tag team from Canada coming there called the "Super Smash Brothers"? Isn't Nintendo fixing to sue somebody?

And if you're gonna show stuff that happened weeks ago, why not show us Ladder War 2? The clips I saw were impressive, and it wouldn't be any different time-wise than what they're putting out there now...

Bone Crusher? Really? That could have been one of the LAMEST promos I have seen cut in a LONG time.

Now, Raw.... Hey. ROH is only a 1 hour show. And it ain't that great.

In case you were wondering, yes. I took my Raw notes as we watched it LIVE at Sports City Cafe. If you weren't there last week, you should join us this week. 'Twas good times, and good times are scheduled again.

Can we just introduce Kofi from Boston now? The cat's kinda out of the bag at this point. Sure, we know Santino is from New Jersey, but Triple H hasn't ever SAID it on live TV.

It was good to see a different side of Chris Masters. I almost get the feeling he had that idea himself. I had Lex Lugar flashbacks there.

I don't get this huge push for Alicia Fox. I don't. Maybe they'll move her to SmackDown and Vickie can slap HER around a bit. My God, did I just put somebody above Vickie? Wow...

Cena dropping "Johnny Dangerously" on us? That was obscure. That was random. And I LOVED IT.

Osbournes? Not an epic fail, but not far off. And I am curious as to how many of the American fans even know who Ricky Hatton IS. I am a boxing fan, so I get it, and I know that the British fans get it (I wonder if Vegas has ever seen fans like that), but outside of that, I wonder.

ECW wasn't much this week.

Rosa Mendes now DOESN'T have an accent? Aw crap, I give up.

Memo to Tony Atlas: YOU'RE TONY ATLAS. Seriously, dude.

Vance Archer? Who in the blue hell is... OH MY GOD. It's Lancy Hoyt without hair. If I hadn't read it earlier this week, I wouldn't have known. Good to see the dude getting work.

Topic Of The Week this week is one I've been meaning to do for weeks, but other stuff has put it back. This week, we're getting to it....

Fixing ECW.

When Vince first became proprietor of ALL of the footage in the history of professional wrestling, I was optimistic that we could get some GREAT collections on DVD. It started strong ("The Rise & Fall Of ECW," "The Road Warriors"), but has kind of faltered ("The Rise & Fall Of WCW," the first Hogan set).

The first "ECW One Night Stand" was genius, but really fell off after that. It's now just "Extreme Rules," and it now replaces "Judgment Day" in May.

Then, Vince decides to bring back ECW and give it a Tuesday night on SyFy (HATE that spelling) time slot. Sure, it's brought ratings to a network that has kind of swum in mediocrity before ("Battlestar Galactica" notwithstanding... that show was amazing, and had one of the best series finales in the history of the medium), but it's still like watching FCW every week. Not a bad idea, but not for ECW.

So, how do we fix it without getting rid of it altogether? Luckily, I have a plan.

First (and they're finally starting to do this a bit), get the SmackDown! roster off of the show. I understand that they tape on the same night (more on that in a bit), but it needs to be its own brand. If you're going to treat it like the bastard child that you do, let it be itself.

Next, separate it completely from SmackDown! I'll even go one step further with it and strip it down completely to the small venues that made ECW exactly what it was. Make the punchline about the "bingo halls" into reality. Sure, you can't take the insurance risks of what it was, but have some fun with it.

Then, make your title matches, oh I don't know... EXTREME. Extreme Rules matches shouldn't be the rareities that they are now. If you're going to be the ECW Champion, then you should know what the "E" stands for.

You can still use it as a breeding ground and transition from FCW to one of the big shows, but give it that old ECW feeling. Personally, I think it would bring ratings up even more and give me something that doesn't turn into background noise. I'm just sayin'.

Long winded? Yes. TOTALLY WORTH IT? I don't know about all that. Until next week...

BB

Bamm-Bamm's Corner, 10/29/2009

Hello, true believers! Let's get to it...

We start with iMpact! Yes, iMpact. My DVR actually got it this week, due to a rerun by CSI:.

So, I guess the Main Event Mafia is done. Unless.... but I'm gettting ahead of myself.

I'm not real on board with the new graphic thing they're doing with the wrestlers. You guys have been on the air long enough; you don't need to tell us things about their finishers and stuff. Hell, even ROH isn't doing that anymore.

I will say this about the diva formerly known as Krystal and now known as Mrs. Bobby Lashley, she looks GREAT. I just hope there's not a her-turning-on-her-husband-for-Steiner-thing. I'm not sure if Steiner is stable enough to handle that kind of thing. Dude's a bit off-center, IF you know what I mean.

MORE PROMOS FROM THE MOTOR CITY MACHINE GUNS! 'Nuff said. These guys are GOLD.

"Meanest Girls"? REALLY? Lame. And this was my first look at Lacey Von Erich. It's called "promo school". Look into it. You're a VON ERICH, for God's sake.

Believe me when I say this: a Dudley Boyz (they'll always be that to me... sue me) heel turn is on the way, and it ain't far off.

Good to see Nigel... I mean Desmond Wolf make his debut. I just don't think he'll be feuding with Angle for very long. Until....

Lastly (for now... Until....), I wanna know how you can get disqualified in a Six Sides Of Steel Match. It's in a CAGE. What a puss way to get out of that one.

Now, let me say that with SmackDown!, I watched it AFTER I saw "Bragging Rights," so the change of Team SmackDown! wasn't that big of a deal to me. Cryme Tyme didn't make that much sense there anyway. Not that Matt does, but whatever. Having watched it after the PPV also could not have made me care less about the opening segment of the show, but I do it for you people. Again, not a recap column, but you never know what nuggets of greatness could come through. Oh wait, this show isn't live... damn.

The only other thing of note is simple: Escobar, PICK AN ACCENT. What were you: Italian, Hispanic, or what? What the crap was THAT?

No Sign Of The Week. Step up your game, people.

Ring Of Honor, Ring Of Honor, Ring Of Honor. The things I do for you people.

So, this week we get the news from the broadcast that Jim Cornette has joined the ranks as an "Executive Producer," which happened for the real world A MONTH AGO. My GOD, how far behind are these tapings? Makes WCW Saturday Night look current when it aired.

And I'm kind of torn on the Necrobutcher. I mean, I know the dude was in "The Wrestler," and he's got that Mick Foley crazy to him (I still think Abyss tries too hard), but I also wonder if he had been somebody a decade ago. It just seems like his bit isn't as effective as it could have been before. But, the dude gets a pop in Ring Of Honor, so god speed, sir.

RAW seemed to be another snore-fest this week. But, here we go anyway...

Oh yeah, before I forget, if you are in the Dallas/Fort Worth area, come by Sports City Cafe in Mesquite Monday night for our first in a series of Raw Watching Parties, which will lead up to our first WWE Pay-Per-View in over a DECADE as we carry "Tables, Ladders, & Chairs" on December 13th LIVE. We really want this to be a huge success, so BE THERE!

Now that I'm done schilling... Wait a sec, this is MY column. If I wanna schill, I'm gonna schill. Deal with it.

So, was Busch supposed to be a heel manager and Logano was a face manager? Didn't really pull that off now, did we?

"The Baby Oil Boys Club"? Now, THAT'S comedy, my friends.

So Kofi now hails from a third home town of Boston (did you catch that on the PPV?). I'll tell you what: this version of Kofi I am TOTALLY on board with. Let this dude loose. Seriously. GREAT stuff there.

And I TOTALLY don't get this Triple Threat match. I've talked about this before, Triple H and HBK have reached that point in their careers where they have transcended even the belt, so they don't really need it. I know that Randy has now been shut out of the title picture for a while, but I'd be on board with Cena battling the other two guys in Legacy for a bit. Would make things more interesting with the eventual turn by one of them, like Randy had to do when he won the belt while with Evolution.

Now, ECW.

Byron Sexton? I know the dude's been working in FCW for a while, but maybe it wasn't time to bring him up to The Show just yet. Wow, this guy is bad. Why can't Striker do double duty? It's not like they do both shows in the same place on the same night or anything...

It amazes me that Shelton Benjamin has been with the WWE for 8 years now. Talk about time flying. And somewhere in America, Charlie Haas is going, "Isn't there somebody else I haven't parodied yet? What about me? What about Haas?" Oh wait, he's married to Jackie Gayda. Carry on...

Been wondering where all of the "Until..."s came from in the iMpact segment? Well, wonder no more. Not wondering? Read anyway.

Well, my planned Topic Of The Week this week has to be put off again due to the announcement 48 hours ago that Hulk Hogan has signed with TNA, and is bringing Eric Bischoff with him. There are conflicting reports of what Hogan's role will be. Immense radio douche Bubba The Love Sponge seems to be telling anyone who will listen that Hogan and Bischoff will be running things, but sources inside the organization say that the booking team will still be the booking team. There is no doubt that Hogan will still have creative control (the dude's had it for almost two decades after all), but what can TNA do with him?

My first thought is that they turn him heel, and he emerges as the new Godfather of the Main Event Mafia. After all, you've already got Nash and Steiner from the old nWo days. I'm not sure if rehashing Hogan/Sting could get the heat that it did twelve years ago, but you never know. You've also got the Jarrett dynamic that you can throw out there.

My issue is that I don't know if he can keep up with some of the younger guys. AJ and Joe can run circles around him at this point, and I just don't know if the chemistry would be there for anybody else.

I haven't decided yet if Hogan is Favre-ing his legacy at this point, but the dude's getting bled dry by his vampiric ex-wife, so work is work, I guess.

As far as Bischoff, I have NO idea where to go with this. From what I have read, he is going to stay behind the scenes with Jason Hervey on a producer's standpoint, but I'm not sure he can. The dude loves to be on camera, and I think it will get to him at some point. I would love to see the Dudleyz do a shoot on him, then take him on as their manager. How bizarre would that be?

Plus, I can't wait for Hogan's first encounter with Jay Lethal. New Mega Powers, anyone?

That's it for this week, my friends and neighbors. Make sure you come see us on Monday night. I'll be there, taking notes for next week's column. Annnnnd... out.

BB

Bamm-Bamm's Corner, 10/22/2009

Alright, let's get this done before the day gets away from us...

Right off the bat, let me be one of the millions to send my prayers to Jim Ross, who had a 3rd attack of Bells Palsy a few days ago. This guy is an absolute legend (I have said on more than one occasion that he and Gordon Solie are the two absolute best to ever put on the headset), and I hope that he is well soon. I want many more years to hear his voice on WWE programming.

Now, on to what we normally do...

I actually got to see Superstars this week. Not much to say but AT LEAST THEY DO A REPLAY. God bless WGN for more than one reason (three words: Bob & Tom), but there is something brewing on the horizon that we will save for another time. Topic Of The Week material.

Now, on to SmackDown! (That wasn't for excitement, it's just the way they list the show.)

OK, so I know that now, we had Maria back ringside, but are we not even going to address any aftermath of the "I don't see you in my future" thing? Is this going to push her heel, or is this going to turn into a Santino Vs. The Divas thing?

Oh GOD, don't make Matt job to Escobar... damn.

I do want to give props to the ring announcer for placing the emphasis on the first word of "THE Miz". Actually made me laugh a bit. It was also good to see Morrison show some aggression a bit, instead of the zen master bit he tends to work. This match may be worth a bit on Sunday.

OK, sure, C.M. Punk has a tattoo of the Pepsi logo on his arm (which I don't get, but he's also got the COBRA logo on the other one... which is cooler), but to call him "The choice of a new generation"? Really? I guess the copyright is up over the slogan, but damn...

I do wonder how Cryme Tyme works in as part of the "heel" SmackDown! team. Granted, you've got Swagger on the Raw team, but this seems just odd. I just fear that all of these matches on Sunday are going to be WAY too short, since you are committing at least an hour to one match in the main event (gotta allot time for a tie... please don't let that happen and taint the greatness of Shawn/Bret), but we shall see.

And is it just me, or does the Undertaker not seem to be into this AT ALL anymore? I am of the opinion that he wants to get to 20-0 at WrestleMania, but right now, that seems to be an ETERNITY away.

Moving on...

This week's Sign Of The Week comes from ECW, which read "Ralphus > The Big Show". Anytime you use a Ralphus reference, that is a WIN in my book.

We go to Ring Of Honor.

The only thing I wonder is about all of this pomp and circumstance with the departure of Brian Danielson, there has been NOTHING mentioned about Nigel McGuinness. We did find out this week that he did not sign with WWE, and is now part of the TNA roster, due to not passing Vince's physical screening. It still does not mean they couldn't give a proper send off to a guy that was their champ for a time. Best of luck to a guy whom I feel was in the best of the best of ROH's roster.

Now, Raw.

For a "family-friendly" show (we'll get to the host in a bit), the DiBiase/Orton thing was a bit much for me. Sure, he FINALLY shoved back, but it was way too late, and he still got punked. Perhaps a follow-up segment or something. And put the IC belt on that kid. He could be the future of this company.

Now, for Snoop. Three words here: walk the line.... hey kids, if you wanna roll the doobies, just tell your folks you're lighting candles! Narf.

Look at Shawn. Look at Janetty. Look at Shawn. Look at Janetty. Look at SHAWN. Look at JANETTY. LIGHT YEARS of difference there. Wow.

Why does the back of Miz's trunks say "Be Miz"? I get "Be Jealous," but why would he want anybody else to be him? Wouldn't that lessen his awesomeness?

Note to Melina: it's OK for you to trip going up the ring steps, just don't mess up the split again. That was WAY more embarrassing.

Lastly, I just wannna say that I want a Santino/Hornswaggle tag team. That would be good times.

Topic Of The Week this week had to be changed when it came down last Friday that Shane McMahon officially gave his notice to the company he has literally spent his entire life with. For those of you that don't know, as of January 1st, 2010, he will no longer work with World Wrestling Entertainment. The rumor that I have heard is that he is going to assist his mother, Linda, with her Senate run in Connecticut. This to me sounds like a good idea, as Shane can now do something outside of "the business" where he can really take charge of something that is not seen as being a puppet of his dad. Sure, he's now working with his mom, but I think he can be given more of a chance to shine on his own merits.

Since this is new territory for both of them, they can make this their own. Add to that the fact that Vince seems to be taking a "hands off" approach to this (which is a VERY good thing... XFL might have gone a bit longer if he did the same thing there), and this can be a great experience for them.

Do I think she can win? The mud is already flying, with videos on her opponent's websites and public statements. It's going to be an uphill battle, but only time can tell what will happen. I'll definitely be keeping an eye on it come the new year.

That's it for this week, my friends and/or neighbors. Take care of yourselves, and we'll do it all again next week.

BB

Bamm-Bamm's Corner: 10/14/2009

OK, let's see if I can remember how to do this...

For those of you that are new to the fold, I am resurrecting a column that I used to write many years ago dealing (for the most part) with the state of professional wrestling. There will be times that I go off the page (more than I used to), but this is the focus of this thing. Now, you may be asking yourself, "What prompted you to do this again?" Well, my good friend (and one of the handful of original readers of this thing) Chad, and I were talking last week, and I did a search on my favorite columnist, Hyatte, whom has landed here at Blogspot. In reading his column that I had not seen in YEARS, it inspired me to get my brain working again and do this thing. Plus, I have a nice little circle of fans who have become friends over the last few years, so hopefully there will be reading here. That being said..

We'll start on a bit of a down note. The great Captain Lou Albano passed away today. This was a guy who was one of the key components in making wrestling fun for the mainstream (his work with Cyndi Lauper both in his arena and hers was HUGE... it was even mentioned on PTI today on ESPN), and he knew how to cut a promo. Some of the guys today can learn something by going back and watching his stuff (and Rock's promo from SD two weeks ago, which is posted on my Facebook... for those of you that aren't on my friends list, the user name is DJBammBamm). He will be sorely missed. Vaya con dios, sir.

We start with SmackDown from last week (I know the new one was taped last night, but I'm not reading spoilers here... at least on this). It's good to see CM Punk actually acting like a heel now, thinking he can bully Teddy Long into giving the remach with the Undertaker to be like it was before, a submission match. My wife (who does not watch much) thought it was odd that they turned him heel by basically saying a positive message (don't drink to excess, don't take drugs, don't abuse prescriptions), and I felt the same way. Just be a heel, dude. Granted, you'll never be a WWE top dog (and don't give me "He was champ in Ring Of Honor".... it's RING OF FREAKING HONOR, which we'll get to in a bit.), but you're giving us SOMETHING to watch from a heel standpoint. I don't even think Edge will be heel when he comes back.

Here's a question, and I've always said this: How can Rey Mysterio be a contender for the HEAVYWEIGHT championship of the world? The belt ways more than he does. Just sayin'.

Memo to the people who record theme music: give Michelle McCool her own theme music. She's got to be sick by now with using Candice Michelle's OLD (like three versions ago), music. And help with mic skills might be a good thing, too.

Anybody else shocked by the fact that this is only the Undertaker's 7th run with the belt? I think it's good, personally. I think some of the title runs as of late is cheapening the fact that Flair's done it 16 times. To this generation, it may come to the point where it's not that big of a deal. (As far as HHH, we'll deal with that in an upcoming column.)

As far as this next point, I only have three words: Why Vickie Why? Narf.

Hey, kids, it's Maria! Where the crap has she been for the last month and a half when it comes to the spare known as Dolph Ziggler? I thought the job of a valet was to actually BE THERE when your man has a match. I do wonder if she turns heel or Melina does. Could go either way.

Lastly on this part of the column, I would just like to plead with stopping with the live intro for R-Truth. Or a character overhaul. Or just putting him with somebody else he can play the lackey role to. This bit plain SUCKS.

OK, one down, three to go....

We now turn our attention to that which is known as Ring Of Honor. If you do not have HDNet, you don't see this one-hour "show," but I'm not a recapper, so if you wanna know what actually happened, you'll have to go elsewhere.

I once had a discussion about professional wrestling in general with a dude who worked at a local video game store (my GOD, could that statement have propetuated the stereotype any more?), and he SWORE to me up and down about the greateness that is ROH. At the time, Samoa Joe was their champ, and CM Punk had just left. So, when HDNet announced that they would be carring one hour of their programming each week (which now airs on Monday nights, right before Raw... hey, they ain't STUPID enough to go head-to-head), I was intrigued. Sometimes, you find a bit of gold in a coal mine, so I'd give it a chance. Granted, I'm still watching, but it's from the standpoint of "this HAS to get better". Then, I find out that one of the guys that I feel is in the upper echelon of the promotion, Nigel McGuinness, has been signed by the WWE and is making the jump soon. (Brian Daniels is also going, who is GREAT technically, but I'm not sure about the personality there.) The presentation is real amateur, the commentary team is HORRIBLE (I'll take this week's SD team of Cole & Grisham over these two). Some MAJOR upgrades are needed for this thing to be even viable anywhere but in the northeast. And don't get it twisted, this isn't even on the street that gets to the interstate that gets to the exit that gets to the frontage road that gets to the remote parking lot that gets to the ballpark of even the original ECW, so don't even try that comparison.

And Bison Smith? I thought the Nasty Boys retired YEARS ago. And that's what I have to say about that.

Sign Of The Week goes to the one made for Chad for his 40th birthday last week by our friend, Tonya. So there, public.

Ah, now to the mainstay of this column: Monday Night Raw. (Put it to you this way: at the height of the Corner, I was still evaluating Nitro.)

To all of the d-X haters: even YOU have to admit that they have been the best thing about this show for MONTHS. Shawn's answering machine ALONE was more entertaining than anything else on that show (except Santino, he ALWAYS can bring the funny). We've been seeing this Legacy split coming from a country mile away, and even Cena seems bored with this. Maybe he can have more fun on SmackDown.

By the way, how can the book be "unauthorized" if THEY WROTE IT?

It's good to see the Divas division coming more to the forefront again, but it has to be understood that there is a SEVERE difference in skill levels between ladies like Mickie James and Jillian on a Grand Canyon-esque level. That was just SLOPPY. I understand you needed to put it on a heel for a nanosecond to get it on Melina, but damn. That was BAD. At least go with Beth Phoenix. Then, the trade might have carried some more weight. And to say Jillian had the shortest reign doesn't carry much weight to a belt that is less than a year old.

And as much as I am all for Snoop hosting, I thought this was supposed to be a "family-friendly" shizzow. This can't be to pimp an album. Then again, Ozzy and Ice-T (both of whom I am a fan of) are hosting before the end of the year, too. So go figure.

As far as ECW goes, yeah, I watched. But this show is ABYSMAL. When Christian finally is done paying his penance to Vince and gets moved off of this show, there may be NO reason to watch, except to comment to you, faithful reader. But that's another topic for another time.

Speaking of topics...

We always wrap up the column with the Topic Of The Week. This week, I answer the question that is: "Hey dude, what about TNA? What about iMpact?"

It's simple. I can't watch it right now.

I have been an avid fan of TNA for almost two years now, ever since I saw them do a house show here at the House of Blues (they've only done one here since... don't get THAT). I really enjoy their product, and sincerely believe that they are at a crossroads where they could either just "stay the course" or step up and could give Vince the competition that he so desperately needs to get the creative juices flowing for rock-solid product.

Enter the banana peel under Dixie Carter's feet.

You see, iMpact! comes on at 8 PM Central Time on Thursdays. Problem there is that I have two other shows on my DVR at that point (The Office and CSI: Vegas), and my DVR can only do two shows at a time (even U-Verse can only do two HD programs at the same time, so THERE), and both of those shows are higher priorities, so iMpact! didn't get recorded then during normal viewing season.

This didn't used to be an issue, as they replayed the show on Saturday mornings, and I would get it then. Again, I REALLY like their product and enjoy watching it. However, two weeks ago, TNA decided to cancel the replay to try to up their ratings on Thursdays. This is not a good idea, kids.

Again, you are on opposite THE OFFICE AND CSI: THE MOTHERSHIP. These two have been ratings juggernauts for YEARS, and you aren't going to beat them. Keeping the Saturday replay is actually better for your ratings, as that is when people of my ilk record it. Bring it back, and you have me back before rerun season.

Or make a move to at least Tuesday nights. You can definitely take on ECW.

And there is the same problem with "WWE Superstars," but come on. It's SUPERSTARS.

That's what I've got for this week. Thanks for reading, and we'll keep this thing up on a weekly basis as much as I can.

BB

New Blog Smell. Same Old Stuff.

What has happened over the last four years? Move to MySpace, move to Facebook, but given what the blog is to become, I am moving part of it back to where it started.

Given the fact that I get to watch some of my shows in more of a timely manner, I have decided to bring back "Bamm-Bamm's Corner," the highly touted wrestling column of the late '90s (and incredibly sporatic early '00s), giving you humor, opinions, great signs, and the always thoughtful "Topic Of The Week".

Due to the fact that it's Friday, I will wait until next week to begin. The differences this time around:

• There is no Nitro.
• There may be notes on iMpact (the reasoning for "may be" will come next week).
• There will be notes on Ring Of Honor.
• There may be notes on ECW (depends on when I write it).
• There will be notes on SmackDown!.
• I'm older now, so that probably means I'm a bit surlier as well.
• I will be bound to go off of the page.

Will it be any good? Will it be on time? Will it last more than a month? Only Uuatu knows...

BB