Bamm-Bamm's Corner, 10/29/2009

Hello, true believers! Let's get to it...

We start with iMpact! Yes, iMpact. My DVR actually got it this week, due to a rerun by CSI:.

So, I guess the Main Event Mafia is done. Unless.... but I'm gettting ahead of myself.

I'm not real on board with the new graphic thing they're doing with the wrestlers. You guys have been on the air long enough; you don't need to tell us things about their finishers and stuff. Hell, even ROH isn't doing that anymore.

I will say this about the diva formerly known as Krystal and now known as Mrs. Bobby Lashley, she looks GREAT. I just hope there's not a her-turning-on-her-husband-for-Steiner-thing. I'm not sure if Steiner is stable enough to handle that kind of thing. Dude's a bit off-center, IF you know what I mean.

MORE PROMOS FROM THE MOTOR CITY MACHINE GUNS! 'Nuff said. These guys are GOLD.

"Meanest Girls"? REALLY? Lame. And this was my first look at Lacey Von Erich. It's called "promo school". Look into it. You're a VON ERICH, for God's sake.

Believe me when I say this: a Dudley Boyz (they'll always be that to me... sue me) heel turn is on the way, and it ain't far off.

Good to see Nigel... I mean Desmond Wolf make his debut. I just don't think he'll be feuding with Angle for very long. Until....

Lastly (for now... Until....), I wanna know how you can get disqualified in a Six Sides Of Steel Match. It's in a CAGE. What a puss way to get out of that one.

Now, let me say that with SmackDown!, I watched it AFTER I saw "Bragging Rights," so the change of Team SmackDown! wasn't that big of a deal to me. Cryme Tyme didn't make that much sense there anyway. Not that Matt does, but whatever. Having watched it after the PPV also could not have made me care less about the opening segment of the show, but I do it for you people. Again, not a recap column, but you never know what nuggets of greatness could come through. Oh wait, this show isn't live... damn.

The only other thing of note is simple: Escobar, PICK AN ACCENT. What were you: Italian, Hispanic, or what? What the crap was THAT?

No Sign Of The Week. Step up your game, people.

Ring Of Honor, Ring Of Honor, Ring Of Honor. The things I do for you people.

So, this week we get the news from the broadcast that Jim Cornette has joined the ranks as an "Executive Producer," which happened for the real world A MONTH AGO. My GOD, how far behind are these tapings? Makes WCW Saturday Night look current when it aired.

And I'm kind of torn on the Necrobutcher. I mean, I know the dude was in "The Wrestler," and he's got that Mick Foley crazy to him (I still think Abyss tries too hard), but I also wonder if he had been somebody a decade ago. It just seems like his bit isn't as effective as it could have been before. But, the dude gets a pop in Ring Of Honor, so god speed, sir.

RAW seemed to be another snore-fest this week. But, here we go anyway...

Oh yeah, before I forget, if you are in the Dallas/Fort Worth area, come by Sports City Cafe in Mesquite Monday night for our first in a series of Raw Watching Parties, which will lead up to our first WWE Pay-Per-View in over a DECADE as we carry "Tables, Ladders, & Chairs" on December 13th LIVE. We really want this to be a huge success, so BE THERE!

Now that I'm done schilling... Wait a sec, this is MY column. If I wanna schill, I'm gonna schill. Deal with it.

So, was Busch supposed to be a heel manager and Logano was a face manager? Didn't really pull that off now, did we?

"The Baby Oil Boys Club"? Now, THAT'S comedy, my friends.

So Kofi now hails from a third home town of Boston (did you catch that on the PPV?). I'll tell you what: this version of Kofi I am TOTALLY on board with. Let this dude loose. Seriously. GREAT stuff there.

And I TOTALLY don't get this Triple Threat match. I've talked about this before, Triple H and HBK have reached that point in their careers where they have transcended even the belt, so they don't really need it. I know that Randy has now been shut out of the title picture for a while, but I'd be on board with Cena battling the other two guys in Legacy for a bit. Would make things more interesting with the eventual turn by one of them, like Randy had to do when he won the belt while with Evolution.

Now, ECW.

Byron Sexton? I know the dude's been working in FCW for a while, but maybe it wasn't time to bring him up to The Show just yet. Wow, this guy is bad. Why can't Striker do double duty? It's not like they do both shows in the same place on the same night or anything...

It amazes me that Shelton Benjamin has been with the WWE for 8 years now. Talk about time flying. And somewhere in America, Charlie Haas is going, "Isn't there somebody else I haven't parodied yet? What about me? What about Haas?" Oh wait, he's married to Jackie Gayda. Carry on...

Been wondering where all of the "Until..."s came from in the iMpact segment? Well, wonder no more. Not wondering? Read anyway.

Well, my planned Topic Of The Week this week has to be put off again due to the announcement 48 hours ago that Hulk Hogan has signed with TNA, and is bringing Eric Bischoff with him. There are conflicting reports of what Hogan's role will be. Immense radio douche Bubba The Love Sponge seems to be telling anyone who will listen that Hogan and Bischoff will be running things, but sources inside the organization say that the booking team will still be the booking team. There is no doubt that Hogan will still have creative control (the dude's had it for almost two decades after all), but what can TNA do with him?

My first thought is that they turn him heel, and he emerges as the new Godfather of the Main Event Mafia. After all, you've already got Nash and Steiner from the old nWo days. I'm not sure if rehashing Hogan/Sting could get the heat that it did twelve years ago, but you never know. You've also got the Jarrett dynamic that you can throw out there.

My issue is that I don't know if he can keep up with some of the younger guys. AJ and Joe can run circles around him at this point, and I just don't know if the chemistry would be there for anybody else.

I haven't decided yet if Hogan is Favre-ing his legacy at this point, but the dude's getting bled dry by his vampiric ex-wife, so work is work, I guess.

As far as Bischoff, I have NO idea where to go with this. From what I have read, he is going to stay behind the scenes with Jason Hervey on a producer's standpoint, but I'm not sure he can. The dude loves to be on camera, and I think it will get to him at some point. I would love to see the Dudleyz do a shoot on him, then take him on as their manager. How bizarre would that be?

Plus, I can't wait for Hogan's first encounter with Jay Lethal. New Mega Powers, anyone?

That's it for this week, my friends and neighbors. Make sure you come see us on Monday night. I'll be there, taking notes for next week's column. Annnnnd... out.

BB

Bamm-Bamm's Corner, 10/22/2009

Alright, let's get this done before the day gets away from us...

Right off the bat, let me be one of the millions to send my prayers to Jim Ross, who had a 3rd attack of Bells Palsy a few days ago. This guy is an absolute legend (I have said on more than one occasion that he and Gordon Solie are the two absolute best to ever put on the headset), and I hope that he is well soon. I want many more years to hear his voice on WWE programming.

Now, on to what we normally do...

I actually got to see Superstars this week. Not much to say but AT LEAST THEY DO A REPLAY. God bless WGN for more than one reason (three words: Bob & Tom), but there is something brewing on the horizon that we will save for another time. Topic Of The Week material.

Now, on to SmackDown! (That wasn't for excitement, it's just the way they list the show.)

OK, so I know that now, we had Maria back ringside, but are we not even going to address any aftermath of the "I don't see you in my future" thing? Is this going to push her heel, or is this going to turn into a Santino Vs. The Divas thing?

Oh GOD, don't make Matt job to Escobar... damn.

I do want to give props to the ring announcer for placing the emphasis on the first word of "THE Miz". Actually made me laugh a bit. It was also good to see Morrison show some aggression a bit, instead of the zen master bit he tends to work. This match may be worth a bit on Sunday.

OK, sure, C.M. Punk has a tattoo of the Pepsi logo on his arm (which I don't get, but he's also got the COBRA logo on the other one... which is cooler), but to call him "The choice of a new generation"? Really? I guess the copyright is up over the slogan, but damn...

I do wonder how Cryme Tyme works in as part of the "heel" SmackDown! team. Granted, you've got Swagger on the Raw team, but this seems just odd. I just fear that all of these matches on Sunday are going to be WAY too short, since you are committing at least an hour to one match in the main event (gotta allot time for a tie... please don't let that happen and taint the greatness of Shawn/Bret), but we shall see.

And is it just me, or does the Undertaker not seem to be into this AT ALL anymore? I am of the opinion that he wants to get to 20-0 at WrestleMania, but right now, that seems to be an ETERNITY away.

Moving on...

This week's Sign Of The Week comes from ECW, which read "Ralphus > The Big Show". Anytime you use a Ralphus reference, that is a WIN in my book.

We go to Ring Of Honor.

The only thing I wonder is about all of this pomp and circumstance with the departure of Brian Danielson, there has been NOTHING mentioned about Nigel McGuinness. We did find out this week that he did not sign with WWE, and is now part of the TNA roster, due to not passing Vince's physical screening. It still does not mean they couldn't give a proper send off to a guy that was their champ for a time. Best of luck to a guy whom I feel was in the best of the best of ROH's roster.

Now, Raw.

For a "family-friendly" show (we'll get to the host in a bit), the DiBiase/Orton thing was a bit much for me. Sure, he FINALLY shoved back, but it was way too late, and he still got punked. Perhaps a follow-up segment or something. And put the IC belt on that kid. He could be the future of this company.

Now, for Snoop. Three words here: walk the line.... hey kids, if you wanna roll the doobies, just tell your folks you're lighting candles! Narf.

Look at Shawn. Look at Janetty. Look at Shawn. Look at Janetty. Look at SHAWN. Look at JANETTY. LIGHT YEARS of difference there. Wow.

Why does the back of Miz's trunks say "Be Miz"? I get "Be Jealous," but why would he want anybody else to be him? Wouldn't that lessen his awesomeness?

Note to Melina: it's OK for you to trip going up the ring steps, just don't mess up the split again. That was WAY more embarrassing.

Lastly, I just wannna say that I want a Santino/Hornswaggle tag team. That would be good times.

Topic Of The Week this week had to be changed when it came down last Friday that Shane McMahon officially gave his notice to the company he has literally spent his entire life with. For those of you that don't know, as of January 1st, 2010, he will no longer work with World Wrestling Entertainment. The rumor that I have heard is that he is going to assist his mother, Linda, with her Senate run in Connecticut. This to me sounds like a good idea, as Shane can now do something outside of "the business" where he can really take charge of something that is not seen as being a puppet of his dad. Sure, he's now working with his mom, but I think he can be given more of a chance to shine on his own merits.

Since this is new territory for both of them, they can make this their own. Add to that the fact that Vince seems to be taking a "hands off" approach to this (which is a VERY good thing... XFL might have gone a bit longer if he did the same thing there), and this can be a great experience for them.

Do I think she can win? The mud is already flying, with videos on her opponent's websites and public statements. It's going to be an uphill battle, but only time can tell what will happen. I'll definitely be keeping an eye on it come the new year.

That's it for this week, my friends and/or neighbors. Take care of yourselves, and we'll do it all again next week.

BB

Bamm-Bamm's Corner: 10/14/2009

OK, let's see if I can remember how to do this...

For those of you that are new to the fold, I am resurrecting a column that I used to write many years ago dealing (for the most part) with the state of professional wrestling. There will be times that I go off the page (more than I used to), but this is the focus of this thing. Now, you may be asking yourself, "What prompted you to do this again?" Well, my good friend (and one of the handful of original readers of this thing) Chad, and I were talking last week, and I did a search on my favorite columnist, Hyatte, whom has landed here at Blogspot. In reading his column that I had not seen in YEARS, it inspired me to get my brain working again and do this thing. Plus, I have a nice little circle of fans who have become friends over the last few years, so hopefully there will be reading here. That being said..

We'll start on a bit of a down note. The great Captain Lou Albano passed away today. This was a guy who was one of the key components in making wrestling fun for the mainstream (his work with Cyndi Lauper both in his arena and hers was HUGE... it was even mentioned on PTI today on ESPN), and he knew how to cut a promo. Some of the guys today can learn something by going back and watching his stuff (and Rock's promo from SD two weeks ago, which is posted on my Facebook... for those of you that aren't on my friends list, the user name is DJBammBamm). He will be sorely missed. Vaya con dios, sir.

We start with SmackDown from last week (I know the new one was taped last night, but I'm not reading spoilers here... at least on this). It's good to see CM Punk actually acting like a heel now, thinking he can bully Teddy Long into giving the remach with the Undertaker to be like it was before, a submission match. My wife (who does not watch much) thought it was odd that they turned him heel by basically saying a positive message (don't drink to excess, don't take drugs, don't abuse prescriptions), and I felt the same way. Just be a heel, dude. Granted, you'll never be a WWE top dog (and don't give me "He was champ in Ring Of Honor".... it's RING OF FREAKING HONOR, which we'll get to in a bit.), but you're giving us SOMETHING to watch from a heel standpoint. I don't even think Edge will be heel when he comes back.

Here's a question, and I've always said this: How can Rey Mysterio be a contender for the HEAVYWEIGHT championship of the world? The belt ways more than he does. Just sayin'.

Memo to the people who record theme music: give Michelle McCool her own theme music. She's got to be sick by now with using Candice Michelle's OLD (like three versions ago), music. And help with mic skills might be a good thing, too.

Anybody else shocked by the fact that this is only the Undertaker's 7th run with the belt? I think it's good, personally. I think some of the title runs as of late is cheapening the fact that Flair's done it 16 times. To this generation, it may come to the point where it's not that big of a deal. (As far as HHH, we'll deal with that in an upcoming column.)

As far as this next point, I only have three words: Why Vickie Why? Narf.

Hey, kids, it's Maria! Where the crap has she been for the last month and a half when it comes to the spare known as Dolph Ziggler? I thought the job of a valet was to actually BE THERE when your man has a match. I do wonder if she turns heel or Melina does. Could go either way.

Lastly on this part of the column, I would just like to plead with stopping with the live intro for R-Truth. Or a character overhaul. Or just putting him with somebody else he can play the lackey role to. This bit plain SUCKS.

OK, one down, three to go....

We now turn our attention to that which is known as Ring Of Honor. If you do not have HDNet, you don't see this one-hour "show," but I'm not a recapper, so if you wanna know what actually happened, you'll have to go elsewhere.

I once had a discussion about professional wrestling in general with a dude who worked at a local video game store (my GOD, could that statement have propetuated the stereotype any more?), and he SWORE to me up and down about the greateness that is ROH. At the time, Samoa Joe was their champ, and CM Punk had just left. So, when HDNet announced that they would be carring one hour of their programming each week (which now airs on Monday nights, right before Raw... hey, they ain't STUPID enough to go head-to-head), I was intrigued. Sometimes, you find a bit of gold in a coal mine, so I'd give it a chance. Granted, I'm still watching, but it's from the standpoint of "this HAS to get better". Then, I find out that one of the guys that I feel is in the upper echelon of the promotion, Nigel McGuinness, has been signed by the WWE and is making the jump soon. (Brian Daniels is also going, who is GREAT technically, but I'm not sure about the personality there.) The presentation is real amateur, the commentary team is HORRIBLE (I'll take this week's SD team of Cole & Grisham over these two). Some MAJOR upgrades are needed for this thing to be even viable anywhere but in the northeast. And don't get it twisted, this isn't even on the street that gets to the interstate that gets to the exit that gets to the frontage road that gets to the remote parking lot that gets to the ballpark of even the original ECW, so don't even try that comparison.

And Bison Smith? I thought the Nasty Boys retired YEARS ago. And that's what I have to say about that.

Sign Of The Week goes to the one made for Chad for his 40th birthday last week by our friend, Tonya. So there, public.

Ah, now to the mainstay of this column: Monday Night Raw. (Put it to you this way: at the height of the Corner, I was still evaluating Nitro.)

To all of the d-X haters: even YOU have to admit that they have been the best thing about this show for MONTHS. Shawn's answering machine ALONE was more entertaining than anything else on that show (except Santino, he ALWAYS can bring the funny). We've been seeing this Legacy split coming from a country mile away, and even Cena seems bored with this. Maybe he can have more fun on SmackDown.

By the way, how can the book be "unauthorized" if THEY WROTE IT?

It's good to see the Divas division coming more to the forefront again, but it has to be understood that there is a SEVERE difference in skill levels between ladies like Mickie James and Jillian on a Grand Canyon-esque level. That was just SLOPPY. I understand you needed to put it on a heel for a nanosecond to get it on Melina, but damn. That was BAD. At least go with Beth Phoenix. Then, the trade might have carried some more weight. And to say Jillian had the shortest reign doesn't carry much weight to a belt that is less than a year old.

And as much as I am all for Snoop hosting, I thought this was supposed to be a "family-friendly" shizzow. This can't be to pimp an album. Then again, Ozzy and Ice-T (both of whom I am a fan of) are hosting before the end of the year, too. So go figure.

As far as ECW goes, yeah, I watched. But this show is ABYSMAL. When Christian finally is done paying his penance to Vince and gets moved off of this show, there may be NO reason to watch, except to comment to you, faithful reader. But that's another topic for another time.

Speaking of topics...

We always wrap up the column with the Topic Of The Week. This week, I answer the question that is: "Hey dude, what about TNA? What about iMpact?"

It's simple. I can't watch it right now.

I have been an avid fan of TNA for almost two years now, ever since I saw them do a house show here at the House of Blues (they've only done one here since... don't get THAT). I really enjoy their product, and sincerely believe that they are at a crossroads where they could either just "stay the course" or step up and could give Vince the competition that he so desperately needs to get the creative juices flowing for rock-solid product.

Enter the banana peel under Dixie Carter's feet.

You see, iMpact! comes on at 8 PM Central Time on Thursdays. Problem there is that I have two other shows on my DVR at that point (The Office and CSI: Vegas), and my DVR can only do two shows at a time (even U-Verse can only do two HD programs at the same time, so THERE), and both of those shows are higher priorities, so iMpact! didn't get recorded then during normal viewing season.

This didn't used to be an issue, as they replayed the show on Saturday mornings, and I would get it then. Again, I REALLY like their product and enjoy watching it. However, two weeks ago, TNA decided to cancel the replay to try to up their ratings on Thursdays. This is not a good idea, kids.

Again, you are on opposite THE OFFICE AND CSI: THE MOTHERSHIP. These two have been ratings juggernauts for YEARS, and you aren't going to beat them. Keeping the Saturday replay is actually better for your ratings, as that is when people of my ilk record it. Bring it back, and you have me back before rerun season.

Or make a move to at least Tuesday nights. You can definitely take on ECW.

And there is the same problem with "WWE Superstars," but come on. It's SUPERSTARS.

That's what I've got for this week. Thanks for reading, and we'll keep this thing up on a weekly basis as much as I can.

BB

New Blog Smell. Same Old Stuff.

What has happened over the last four years? Move to MySpace, move to Facebook, but given what the blog is to become, I am moving part of it back to where it started.

Given the fact that I get to watch some of my shows in more of a timely manner, I have decided to bring back "Bamm-Bamm's Corner," the highly touted wrestling column of the late '90s (and incredibly sporatic early '00s), giving you humor, opinions, great signs, and the always thoughtful "Topic Of The Week".

Due to the fact that it's Friday, I will wait until next week to begin. The differences this time around:

• There is no Nitro.
• There may be notes on iMpact (the reasoning for "may be" will come next week).
• There will be notes on Ring Of Honor.
• There may be notes on ECW (depends on when I write it).
• There will be notes on SmackDown!.
• I'm older now, so that probably means I'm a bit surlier as well.
• I will be bound to go off of the page.

Will it be any good? Will it be on time? Will it last more than a month? Only Uuatu knows...

BB