Allllready. Let's get into it...
No iMpact! stuff this week. I've been under the weather and didn't wanna leave the house. So sue me.
Did get to watch Superstars this week (see what happens when you do an encore presentation of your product?), so here we are...
Is it bad that during Primo's match that all I was thinking was "Where the heck has Carlito been?" Never thought I'd see the day that Primo would take the driver's seat. Not necessarily a bad thing, but wow.
Also, one has to wonder why Burchill isn't good enough for the League Of Nations. It's not like he used to work with Regal as a pirate or anything....
Finally, I wonder if Striker can sue Jericho for gimmick infringement with the five dollar college words.
SmackDown! is where we move to next.
You know, I have been called a lot of things in this life (some of them even have some truth to them), but "gelatinous" is not one of them. Sure, I'm a big dude, but damn...
Striker really has, in my opinion, found his calling here. I would love to see him work with JR when he gets back. A three man table? Maybe, but I could do without Grisham and the fake Martin Short that does the "Free For All" before the PPV's. And the ECW announce team.
The only other thing I really have to say here is hey, it's Rey Rey versus a big man... AGAIN. Narf.
Sign Of The Week winner this time around is "Jillian 4 X-Factor". For those of you that don't know, it's the UK's "Idol". Funny!
To Raw we go...
Ricky Hatton looked absolutely CLUELESS here. I did notice that he didn't bother to even try to say anybody's names so he didn't screw them up. The dude looked like he stopped hitting the heavy bag and BECAME it. Thank God he didn't go shirtless in his "match".
LOVE that shirt Shawn had. Good times.
Anybody else think Vince could take a page out of TNA's book and get some Diva Tag Belts? Might make the Diva tag matches not be as "whatever" as they are now. Oh wait, this is the company that has ECW, with ONE BELT. Go fig.
Didn't realize that WrestleMania is "the hottest ticket in town," which is a bit that they showed right after a spot letting you know that there are tickets still available.
Shamus? Meh.
"Cinco Dart Mayo," Chavo? Good stuff. And man, Chavo got TAGGED in that match. About as close to a perfect spot (and noise) as you can get.
Here's another bold prediction: a Miz/Swagger tag team is coming. BELIEVE IT.
Finally here, I don't care how many times I have to say this... I LOVE THIS KOFI KINGSTON PUSH. This could be the best move they've made in a long time, and it shows. The fans LOVE this, and the fact that they are having him take it straight to Orton makes it even better. Orton tries to retreat, and Kofi follows. THAT is how you do it, kids.
And I'm totally on board with the potential of the main event on Raw next week.
ECW had a bit to let me talk about, so let's do it...
When is somebody going to let Abraham Washington know that his watch reads 14:59? This bit was old before they even did it.
And Tony Atlas: you're a HALL OF FAMER, dammit. This is lower than when you were forced to be Mark Henry's lackey.
You know, I bet Zack Ryder wishes he was an Edge lackey again. Probably not as much as Hawkins, but still...
Really, Josh Matthews? Tiffany found Vance Archer when she discovered him in JAPAN? I didn't know that iMpact taped there.
And for those of you wondering, there's no WAY that Helms is the guy appearing as The Hurricane as of late.
Topic Of The Week is something that's been kind of bothering me as of late. As many of you know, Hogan is doing a tour of Austrailia before he gets the ball rolling with TNA. You may have also have read that Flair is going to be wrestling, and they are wrestling each other in each main event.
I know what you're thinking: "I know what's bugging you, Rob... Flair is returning to the rign without Shawn coming out and saying that he's cool with it..." At first, I was, and I'm not afraid to admit that. But, something's bothering me more...
Why do they have to wrestle each other? There's no WAY that Flair wins any of these matches (I mean "Hulkamania" is in the NAME OF THE TOUR), but why not go the other way with it, by letting them tag? Granted, you wouldn't have gotten the promo that Flair cut on the Interwebs for it (go look it up... you'll swear that it's 1987 again if you close your eyes), but Flair vs. Hogan barely lived up to any hype when WCW finally did it in like '93. Now, it just seems kinda sad. Let them go up against a couple of the younger pups and have some fun with it.
And Flair's getting married AGAIN. Ah, what the hell... mazel tov.
All right, all right, all right... I'm getting done just in time before Superstars starts this cycle all over again (I'm in Texarkana, Texas right now, so I can watch both it and iMpact! tonight), so until next time... laters.
BB
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Wednesday, November 04, 2009
Bamm-Bamm's Corner, 04 November 2009
Holy crap! Another column! Keepin' the streak alive, kids, so here we go...
We start again with iMpact! Given the fact that we had the Hogan announcement and I couldn't record it, I actually went up to my sports bar to watch. For you people. Because I care. Or something like that.
We start with Desmond "My name is Nigel, dammit" Wolfe. I still want to know the REAL reason that Vince passed on this guy. I don't see him as that injury prone (coughAnglecough), but who am I to judge. I will say that he can be main event material in TNA. Here's a question, though: British Invasion, anyone? They've already got really cool shirts, and I think he could REALLY make them viable, and a split from World Elite wouldn't be a bad thing. I'm just sayin'.
So, I guess now that Angle is working face. I had to contact my good friend Mrrrrrrrrrr Coronado.... Coronado on this one, and he has actually worked face before (think the milk truck incident), but I think that only lasted about two weeks. Oddly enough, though, this kinda works for me. Maybe face berzerker Angle is what we need right now.
Is it just me, or does Rhyno sound like Eric Young?
A nice double swerve from Mick this past week, but I have to give a "WTF" for that promo afterwards. Heel Mick Foley just isn't getting it done anymore. I've always been more of a Commissioner Mick guy at this point in his career, but that's maybe just me. I'm a different breed of cat.
And as far as the Hogan press conference goes, he's a "momentum shifter"? Maybe 15, even 10 years ago, but I'm not sure. And he wants to bring "the art" back to professional wrestling? I kinda feel that TNA does a decent job of that on it's own. I've enjoyed their product for some time now, and find that their matches have better quality than Vince's.
And, I am reading that Sting will be off until "deep into 2010". Maybe it's because..... wait for it..... wait for it.... wait for it... WE GET BACK OLD SCHOOL STING!!!!! BLEACH THE HAIR AND BRIGHTEN UP THE FACE PAINT, BABY!!!!!!
(That was for all of you O.G. Corner readers. Both of you.)
Aaaaanyway... to Superstars we go.
Memo to Lawler: I HAVE to watch "Bragging Rights"? I already did, and I don't.
Rosa Mendez has an accent now? Wait for it, it's coming later...
I'm not sure what I am more sick of: "vintage," "bragging rights," or "smart, sexy, and powerful". Discuss.
Did we have to label Tyler Rex (I actually had to think to remember his name from my notes) vs. Zack Ryder as "East Coast Vs. West Coast"? 1994 called and said "Come On, For The Love Of GOD".
I have a note on Matt Striker here, but I'll save it for SmackDown!. My GOD, this show isn't what it was supposed to be. Remember when Superstars was supposed to be brand vs. brand? What the hell happened here? Bring back All-American Wrestling on USA Sunday mornings over this crap.
Sign Of The Week goes to the guy who simply had "SIGN" written. Simple and fun.
SmackDown! comes next. Is Teddy Long now oficially a "tweener"? He convinces Frenchie to turn on his brand to win Bragging Rights, but still tries to distance himself from Punk. I think he needs another female valet that can slap Vickie around a bit.
It's good to see Drew McIntire finally get a feud that might be entertaining. It's not like the Irish like to fight or anything. Where have I heard that before. Maybe for the love of Hornswoggle, unless he starts a tag team with Santino.
You know what I want from this Barista/Rey Rey angle? For Rey to try and try again to convince Barista that this is just "brothers fighting," Barista to keep telling him to go to New Jersey, and then for Rey to pull a double-swerve and go heel on Barista. Haven't had a good one of those in a while.
Here's something I thought I'd never say: GENIUS from Todd Grisham talking about having his Halloween costume be k.d. lang. THAT was funny; I don't care WHO you are.
I also wonder if JTG is the reason that Shad Gaspar still has a job. I like Shad and have made no bones there, but JTG has really emerged as the mouthpiece of that group. The dude can cut a promo and really has more energy than any one individual should at times.
You know, just when I thought we were on the right path of selling Punk as a heel, we have him in a match with a ref? Sure, the dude's an Armstrong, and did his time as a wrestler (it's kind of the law with that last name, if you do your homework... OK, here's a start: Road Dogg is one of his brothers... you do the rest), but it just didn't really work for me.
Lastly, as I promised earlier, I have determined that Matt Striker is given a list of five-dollar college words that he has to work into the broadcast at some point. I really do, and it entertains me. So there.
OK, to ROH we go...
Did I hear Prazak correctly when he said there was a tag team from Canada coming there called the "Super Smash Brothers"? Isn't Nintendo fixing to sue somebody?
And if you're gonna show stuff that happened weeks ago, why not show us Ladder War 2? The clips I saw were impressive, and it wouldn't be any different time-wise than what they're putting out there now...
Bone Crusher? Really? That could have been one of the LAMEST promos I have seen cut in a LONG time.
Now, Raw.... Hey. ROH is only a 1 hour show. And it ain't that great.
In case you were wondering, yes. I took my Raw notes as we watched it LIVE at Sports City Cafe. If you weren't there last week, you should join us this week. 'Twas good times, and good times are scheduled again.
Can we just introduce Kofi from Boston now? The cat's kinda out of the bag at this point. Sure, we know Santino is from New Jersey, but Triple H hasn't ever SAID it on live TV.
It was good to see a different side of Chris Masters. I almost get the feeling he had that idea himself. I had Lex Lugar flashbacks there.
I don't get this huge push for Alicia Fox. I don't. Maybe they'll move her to SmackDown and Vickie can slap HER around a bit. My God, did I just put somebody above Vickie? Wow...
Cena dropping "Johnny Dangerously" on us? That was obscure. That was random. And I LOVED IT.
Osbournes? Not an epic fail, but not far off. And I am curious as to how many of the American fans even know who Ricky Hatton IS. I am a boxing fan, so I get it, and I know that the British fans get it (I wonder if Vegas has ever seen fans like that), but outside of that, I wonder.
ECW wasn't much this week.
Rosa Mendes now DOESN'T have an accent? Aw crap, I give up.
Memo to Tony Atlas: YOU'RE TONY ATLAS. Seriously, dude.
Vance Archer? Who in the blue hell is... OH MY GOD. It's Lancy Hoyt without hair. If I hadn't read it earlier this week, I wouldn't have known. Good to see the dude getting work.
Topic Of The Week this week is one I've been meaning to do for weeks, but other stuff has put it back. This week, we're getting to it....
Fixing ECW.
When Vince first became proprietor of ALL of the footage in the history of professional wrestling, I was optimistic that we could get some GREAT collections on DVD. It started strong ("The Rise & Fall Of ECW," "The Road Warriors"), but has kind of faltered ("The Rise & Fall Of WCW," the first Hogan set).
The first "ECW One Night Stand" was genius, but really fell off after that. It's now just "Extreme Rules," and it now replaces "Judgment Day" in May.
Then, Vince decides to bring back ECW and give it a Tuesday night on SyFy (HATE that spelling) time slot. Sure, it's brought ratings to a network that has kind of swum in mediocrity before ("Battlestar Galactica" notwithstanding... that show was amazing, and had one of the best series finales in the history of the medium), but it's still like watching FCW every week. Not a bad idea, but not for ECW.
So, how do we fix it without getting rid of it altogether? Luckily, I have a plan.
First (and they're finally starting to do this a bit), get the SmackDown! roster off of the show. I understand that they tape on the same night (more on that in a bit), but it needs to be its own brand. If you're going to treat it like the bastard child that you do, let it be itself.
Next, separate it completely from SmackDown! I'll even go one step further with it and strip it down completely to the small venues that made ECW exactly what it was. Make the punchline about the "bingo halls" into reality. Sure, you can't take the insurance risks of what it was, but have some fun with it.
Then, make your title matches, oh I don't know... EXTREME. Extreme Rules matches shouldn't be the rareities that they are now. If you're going to be the ECW Champion, then you should know what the "E" stands for.
You can still use it as a breeding ground and transition from FCW to one of the big shows, but give it that old ECW feeling. Personally, I think it would bring ratings up even more and give me something that doesn't turn into background noise. I'm just sayin'.
Long winded? Yes. TOTALLY WORTH IT? I don't know about all that. Until next week...
BB
We start again with iMpact! Given the fact that we had the Hogan announcement and I couldn't record it, I actually went up to my sports bar to watch. For you people. Because I care. Or something like that.
We start with Desmond "My name is Nigel, dammit" Wolfe. I still want to know the REAL reason that Vince passed on this guy. I don't see him as that injury prone (coughAnglecough), but who am I to judge. I will say that he can be main event material in TNA. Here's a question, though: British Invasion, anyone? They've already got really cool shirts, and I think he could REALLY make them viable, and a split from World Elite wouldn't be a bad thing. I'm just sayin'.
So, I guess now that Angle is working face. I had to contact my good friend Mrrrrrrrrrr Coronado.... Coronado on this one, and he has actually worked face before (think the milk truck incident), but I think that only lasted about two weeks. Oddly enough, though, this kinda works for me. Maybe face berzerker Angle is what we need right now.
Is it just me, or does Rhyno sound like Eric Young?
A nice double swerve from Mick this past week, but I have to give a "WTF" for that promo afterwards. Heel Mick Foley just isn't getting it done anymore. I've always been more of a Commissioner Mick guy at this point in his career, but that's maybe just me. I'm a different breed of cat.
And as far as the Hogan press conference goes, he's a "momentum shifter"? Maybe 15, even 10 years ago, but I'm not sure. And he wants to bring "the art" back to professional wrestling? I kinda feel that TNA does a decent job of that on it's own. I've enjoyed their product for some time now, and find that their matches have better quality than Vince's.
And, I am reading that Sting will be off until "deep into 2010". Maybe it's because..... wait for it..... wait for it.... wait for it... WE GET BACK OLD SCHOOL STING!!!!! BLEACH THE HAIR AND BRIGHTEN UP THE FACE PAINT, BABY!!!!!!
(That was for all of you O.G. Corner readers. Both of you.)
Aaaaanyway... to Superstars we go.
Memo to Lawler: I HAVE to watch "Bragging Rights"? I already did, and I don't.
Rosa Mendez has an accent now? Wait for it, it's coming later...
I'm not sure what I am more sick of: "vintage," "bragging rights," or "smart, sexy, and powerful". Discuss.
Did we have to label Tyler Rex (I actually had to think to remember his name from my notes) vs. Zack Ryder as "East Coast Vs. West Coast"? 1994 called and said "Come On, For The Love Of GOD".
I have a note on Matt Striker here, but I'll save it for SmackDown!. My GOD, this show isn't what it was supposed to be. Remember when Superstars was supposed to be brand vs. brand? What the hell happened here? Bring back All-American Wrestling on USA Sunday mornings over this crap.
Sign Of The Week goes to the guy who simply had "SIGN" written. Simple and fun.
SmackDown! comes next. Is Teddy Long now oficially a "tweener"? He convinces Frenchie to turn on his brand to win Bragging Rights, but still tries to distance himself from Punk. I think he needs another female valet that can slap Vickie around a bit.
It's good to see Drew McIntire finally get a feud that might be entertaining. It's not like the Irish like to fight or anything. Where have I heard that before. Maybe for the love of Hornswoggle, unless he starts a tag team with Santino.
You know what I want from this Barista/Rey Rey angle? For Rey to try and try again to convince Barista that this is just "brothers fighting," Barista to keep telling him to go to New Jersey, and then for Rey to pull a double-swerve and go heel on Barista. Haven't had a good one of those in a while.
Here's something I thought I'd never say: GENIUS from Todd Grisham talking about having his Halloween costume be k.d. lang. THAT was funny; I don't care WHO you are.
I also wonder if JTG is the reason that Shad Gaspar still has a job. I like Shad and have made no bones there, but JTG has really emerged as the mouthpiece of that group. The dude can cut a promo and really has more energy than any one individual should at times.
You know, just when I thought we were on the right path of selling Punk as a heel, we have him in a match with a ref? Sure, the dude's an Armstrong, and did his time as a wrestler (it's kind of the law with that last name, if you do your homework... OK, here's a start: Road Dogg is one of his brothers... you do the rest), but it just didn't really work for me.
Lastly, as I promised earlier, I have determined that Matt Striker is given a list of five-dollar college words that he has to work into the broadcast at some point. I really do, and it entertains me. So there.
OK, to ROH we go...
Did I hear Prazak correctly when he said there was a tag team from Canada coming there called the "Super Smash Brothers"? Isn't Nintendo fixing to sue somebody?
And if you're gonna show stuff that happened weeks ago, why not show us Ladder War 2? The clips I saw were impressive, and it wouldn't be any different time-wise than what they're putting out there now...
Bone Crusher? Really? That could have been one of the LAMEST promos I have seen cut in a LONG time.
Now, Raw.... Hey. ROH is only a 1 hour show. And it ain't that great.
In case you were wondering, yes. I took my Raw notes as we watched it LIVE at Sports City Cafe. If you weren't there last week, you should join us this week. 'Twas good times, and good times are scheduled again.
Can we just introduce Kofi from Boston now? The cat's kinda out of the bag at this point. Sure, we know Santino is from New Jersey, but Triple H hasn't ever SAID it on live TV.
It was good to see a different side of Chris Masters. I almost get the feeling he had that idea himself. I had Lex Lugar flashbacks there.
I don't get this huge push for Alicia Fox. I don't. Maybe they'll move her to SmackDown and Vickie can slap HER around a bit. My God, did I just put somebody above Vickie? Wow...
Cena dropping "Johnny Dangerously" on us? That was obscure. That was random. And I LOVED IT.
Osbournes? Not an epic fail, but not far off. And I am curious as to how many of the American fans even know who Ricky Hatton IS. I am a boxing fan, so I get it, and I know that the British fans get it (I wonder if Vegas has ever seen fans like that), but outside of that, I wonder.
ECW wasn't much this week.
Rosa Mendes now DOESN'T have an accent? Aw crap, I give up.
Memo to Tony Atlas: YOU'RE TONY ATLAS. Seriously, dude.
Vance Archer? Who in the blue hell is... OH MY GOD. It's Lancy Hoyt without hair. If I hadn't read it earlier this week, I wouldn't have known. Good to see the dude getting work.
Topic Of The Week this week is one I've been meaning to do for weeks, but other stuff has put it back. This week, we're getting to it....
Fixing ECW.
When Vince first became proprietor of ALL of the footage in the history of professional wrestling, I was optimistic that we could get some GREAT collections on DVD. It started strong ("The Rise & Fall Of ECW," "The Road Warriors"), but has kind of faltered ("The Rise & Fall Of WCW," the first Hogan set).
The first "ECW One Night Stand" was genius, but really fell off after that. It's now just "Extreme Rules," and it now replaces "Judgment Day" in May.
Then, Vince decides to bring back ECW and give it a Tuesday night on SyFy (HATE that spelling) time slot. Sure, it's brought ratings to a network that has kind of swum in mediocrity before ("Battlestar Galactica" notwithstanding... that show was amazing, and had one of the best series finales in the history of the medium), but it's still like watching FCW every week. Not a bad idea, but not for ECW.
So, how do we fix it without getting rid of it altogether? Luckily, I have a plan.
First (and they're finally starting to do this a bit), get the SmackDown! roster off of the show. I understand that they tape on the same night (more on that in a bit), but it needs to be its own brand. If you're going to treat it like the bastard child that you do, let it be itself.
Next, separate it completely from SmackDown! I'll even go one step further with it and strip it down completely to the small venues that made ECW exactly what it was. Make the punchline about the "bingo halls" into reality. Sure, you can't take the insurance risks of what it was, but have some fun with it.
Then, make your title matches, oh I don't know... EXTREME. Extreme Rules matches shouldn't be the rareities that they are now. If you're going to be the ECW Champion, then you should know what the "E" stands for.
You can still use it as a breeding ground and transition from FCW to one of the big shows, but give it that old ECW feeling. Personally, I think it would bring ratings up even more and give me something that doesn't turn into background noise. I'm just sayin'.
Long winded? Yes. TOTALLY WORTH IT? I don't know about all that. Until next week...
BB
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