Bamm-Bamm's Corner, 12/22/2009

First off, read the last column and say it with me.... CALLED THAT.

I've had a tough time trying to figure out what to write about this week, and the inspiration just hit me.

I'm sitting here watching the WWE "Tribute To The Troops" special that NBC aired last Saturday night (the 8th one they've done, for those of you playing the home game), and I think every year about how awesome this thing is.  When you realize that they do this thing almost as a "turn and burn," (remember, Raw was live the week before AND the week after they did this special), and seeing the joy and happiness that it brings to the troops leads me to one conclusion.

I don't care if you hate the very existance of professional wrestling.  I don't care if you think it's lame and pointless.  I don't care if you call it "fake," "stupid," or any negative label that makes you think you look cool to your friends.  I don't care if you snicker when you see me wearing any gear that supports programming that I have enjoyed since I wore a younger man's clothes.  Do it all you want, but I can say with a decent amount of certainty that the people whose work YOU enjoy don't go IN PERSON to a bonafide war zone to bring some fun to the people that lay down their lives for YOU each and every day, and even if they do (and I thank them for that), they don't do it EVERY YEAR, especially during the holidays.

This show hits me where I live each and every year.  To see the troops react like they do and talk about how they look forward to this event each and every year (and it is in a different place each and every year, by the way) is just amazing.  If this show does not affect you, then you are soulless.  I don't care who you are, you HAVE to respect the love and commitment that the WWE gives, not only to our troops, but also to the community itself (promotions involving literacy, Make A Wish, soldiers at home, etc.).

Let it also be said that TNA does some great charity work as well.  Have to give respect where respect is due.

Finally this week, while I am talking about celebrities entertaining our troops, I want to recommend a great documentary to all of you.  It is called "Patriot Act," and it is about a 2 week trip that Jeffrey Ross took to the Middle East with Drew Carey, Blake Clark, and a few other comedians to entertain our men and women over there.  What started as just a home movie turned into a life-changing documentary for him.  If you have the Netflix Instant Queue, it is available there to stream.  Think about those men and women this time of year that are half a world away from their families and send a request to whomever you believe in at the end of this mortal coil to keep them safe and bring them home even safer.

Happy Holidays to all of you, and make sure you hug your loved ones a little tighter, because they are YOURS.

BB

Bamm-Bamm's Corner, 12/09/2009

We're skipping all of the formalities this week, because I have a bold statment to make.

Shemus wins the belt at TLC, which you can see at Sports City Cafe in Mesquite, Texas.  So if you are close by (or close enough to get there), come join us!

Done laughing?  I'll wait....

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We good?  OK, follow me here...

I'd like to take you back to a simpler time that I like to call March of 1999.  I was ten years younger, I would meet the woman who would become my wife 6 months later, and WCW did a Pay-Per-View called Spring Stampede.

The main event of this event was a four corners match for the World Heavyweight Title.  You had Sting, Flair, Hogan, and a barely-there midcarder named... Diamond Dallas Page (Savage was the special guest referee).  I even punched the match up on YouTube to refresh my own memory.  If you remember correctly, nobody, and I mean NOBODY, understood why DDP was in this match.  (Granted, later we would find out that he is Bischoff's next door neighbor, and he was the dude that introduced Bischoff to Goldberg, and he does yoga... have no idea what that has to do with anything, but I was going with the "comedy rule of three" there.)  Even up until the match itself started, nobody really expected anything to happen of any consequence.  Then, a blown knee later on a figure four by DDP on Hogan (it's about at the 9 minute mark of Part 1 on YouTube) on the ring post, and things got interesting.  (The fact that people still use that move is INSANE.)

As the match progressed, I was in wonder at the amount of action that really was going on in this match.  For a Four Corners Match, I was intrigued by all four men and their goings on.  With Savage as the ref, his little "swerve" of dropping the elbow on Flair as he had the Figure Four on Sting (I wonder if this was supposed to be where Hogan won... come ON, you can't say you didn't think it either) created a quick Diamond Cutter by DDP and a pin.  The "???" of the entire crowd was deafening.  Here you have Hogan (dude has Creative Control, and he just didn't book himself to do the job without a lot of money and coaxing), Sting (my leader, especially OLD SCHOOL STING!!!!! IF HE HAD BEEN BLONDE AND WORE THE COLORS, THERE WOULD HAVE BEEN NO WAY HE WOULD HAVE LOST!!!!), and Flair (almost as long of a shot as Page, given the bad blood between him and Bischoff, and therefore by proxy, Hogan).  At the time, DDP couldn't draw heat if you taped a bunch of matches to him and dragged him across a field of flint.

And they put the belt on him.

As time went on, he would get it again, but he would end up being just a transitional champion (*coughCMPunkcough*).  Sure that may be true, but you know what?

YOU didn't see it coming.

When Shemus won that battle royal (and my GOD, how is it possible for Ventura to suck so much ass with a mic in the ring, but to be so GREAT at the announce table?  Even made Vince better...), I know that all of you had the same reaction that I did.  "I smell shenanigans here... Where's Randy to swerve this thing?  Where's d-X to make a case and get in?  WHERE IS OLD SCHOOL STING, FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS GOOD AND HOLY?"

OK, maybe not that last one, but if you did, God bless you.

But it didn't happen.  This is the match that is booked as THE MAIN EVENT OF A PAY-PER-VIEW.  That YOU can see on a really big screen at Sports City Cafe in Mesquite, Texas.  If you miss it, I don't wanna hear you whine about it.  And this is a Tables Match.

So, a mid-carder in the main event at a Pay-Per-View that nobody thinks can carry the company?

It's happened before.  And it will happen again.  Sure, I know the "get beat down on the Raw before the PPV, win at the PPV" principle (I virtually coined the phrase), but that could play into this whole thing too.

And d-X will win the Tag Belts.  No real parallel here.  Just wanted to say it.

Lastly, I thank the greatness that is my Tonya for the greatest sign EVER.  It's on my Facebook if you wanna see it, but it says "Rob > Ralphus".  If ya get it, ya get it.  If ya don't, ya don't.

Until next time, when I'm deciding that I like this format...

BB